Love...

I love my partner Blaine very much, he's the most amazing person i could have ever hoped to meet & be with. We've been together for just over 4 years now, he takes care of me, he loves me & makes me feel needed.
unfortunately the events of this summer have complicated my relationship with him. Due to my prior abandonment issues & the fact that he didn't answer his phone when i called him after the accident made me feel more abandoned (and slightly resentful of the fact that he wasn't there when i needed him more than anything or anyone...there is nothing that can be done to change that fact or its effects and its something that has definitely made things more complicated).
then there is the fact that he really REALLY doesn't want to go/move out of Portland where as i REALLY REALLY do at this point (that may change over the course of the year, we'll see what happens) which complicates things further because if i still want to leave at the end of the year & he doesn't i'll likely end up feeling at least slightly resentful for staying and he will resent me if i make us move.
I wont let this unfortunate curve ball fate has thrown at us end our relationship, the one needs the other just as much as the other needs him, he keeps me safe & a roof over my head and i keep his life & affairs in order and out of chaos & disarray; a better matched pair of disfunctional souls there is not.