Life is full of difficult decissions to make and things to do. How do you, firstly, accept that you've come to despise the person who is supposed to be your best friend? further more, how do you cope with the fact that said friend is someone who you've looked up to since you met them, someone you admired as a good person and used to look to for advice?
once again people turn out to not be what they seem to be, deep down. Its that same feeling of crushing disapointment, the heros are dead, or rather they never existed, not untarnished. After you've learned to see through someone's act and are confronted with the man behind the curtain...lets just say you're left feeling more than a little bitter about the situation.
You give and give and give and none of it gets reciprocated, except for a little bit of time, but none of the emotional reciprocation that is necessary to have a healthy freindship.
I've come to the conclusion that it is time to tell my friend to go back home where she belongs. She's busy destroying herself because she's under the dillusion that suffering will make her a better person. I am a strong person because i'm a survivor, my angst & baggage hasn't killed me yet and i don't intend to let it...i've had years of time & disapline to learn & build up the coping mechanisms necessary to deal with this sort of internal and external torment from the world.
what are you doing here?? you've had your little bohemian fantasy here for 5 years, now go home before you destroy yourself you damn fool!
I can NOT abide people who throw away amazing gifts that are given to them! she has the most amazing loving parents anyone could ask for, she was spoiled & pampered her whole life, the worst she's had to deal with is a borken ankle, a traumatic relationship and an abortion...in the grand scheme of things, that ISN"T that much. not when the rest of your life up to that point has been a pampered pallace of love and adoration. and she THREW IT AWAY. she who could have had help in her relocation, assistance when she needed it, etc....she threw it away...she RAN away. i CAN"T fathom this sort of behavior.
It took me a long time to build up the courage to leave home and i hadn't intended to tell my parents about it, but they found out about it because i needed them to move me, i could have left my stuff behind but i couldn't get myself to do it. I wanted my parents, who DESERVE this sort of treatment, to come home and find a note saying that i had left, gone away, and wasn't coming back, and no i'm not telling you where i've gone.
poor inga's parents...her dad was heartbroken, i feel so sorry for them because they are AMAZING people and their daughter is a spoiled ingrate!
i just can't fathom it! WHY??
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